Friday, October 15, 2010
This week began rather tumultuously. Monday brought with it enough discouragement to last me the entire week but I'm much too ornery for that, or so I like to think.
As I drove home that night after work, I could think of no better way to spend my evening than wasting away in a heap on the floor trying to figure out what went wrong. However, God in his gracious wisdom intervened and informed me that would not be necessary. It was not at all a fitting way for the daughter of a King to spend her time.
So I spent some time instead, asking the Lord one very simple question. Why did the circumstances of this day affect me so negatively? Certainly I could have avoided all of this angst. Then, over the next few days He very graciously answered my prayer.
I have learned some very revealing things about myself - revelations I might not have come to face had Monday never occurred and had I not realized, it wasn't at all about the circumstances. It was my response to them which caused me to seek the Lord for clarity in the first place. Of course I prayed for the rest of my week to go much smoother than Monday, and for the most part it did. However, that one day's events illuminated some areas in my life which had been hidden in the shadows - areas in which I needed to grow.
Most days I enjoy living in the moment. Yet I often forget that it is in those moments, in both the sublime and the agonizing, that I am being molded, shaped and perfected, or not. Therefore, I am learning to live not only fully present but also aware of the impact each moment may have on the ones yet to come.
It is a fact that each day has a beginning and an end. We close the door on one day and open it to a new one. However, in living with an eternal perspective where we realize each moment builds upon another and affects our lives in the present and the future, we can begin to see the door remains open. The days may come and go but we can look in enough to see that there is more to this thing than meets the eye. God is doing something behind the scenes in those hidden places of our lives. The door to our transformation remains open for us to walk through if we dare.
I'm not saying that I have this all together, that I have it made. But I am well on my way, reaching out for Christ, who has so wondrously reached out for me. Friends, don't get me wrong: By no means do I count myself an expert in all of this, but I've got my eye on the goal, where God is beckoning us onward—to Jesus. I'm off and running, and I'm not turning back. Philippians 3:12-13 (The Message)